Thursday, May 30, 2013

Thoughtful About . . . Being Still

The Dance Class by Edgar Degas

It's a crazy-busy week around here right now, with everything from kids' checkups to Xoe's follow-up at Johns Hopkins on Monday. We have ballet rehearsal, ballet recital, I have a book talk on the free night between those...I've got book club and my checkup, dentist appointments and normal stuff for church. Oh, and in the midst of all that, I've got to get one title for WhiteFire edited, another laid out for press, final edits prepared on a third, and proof approval on a fourth.

Let's not even look ahead to next week, when I have to start cutting my behemoth of a manuscript by 35K words. (Insert weeping and gnashing of teeth here.)

I'm a little busy. A little overwhelmed. And I don't know about you, but when I get busy and overwhelmed, I get this strange sensation...I start to feel alone. Like the world is a sea tossing around me, and I'm all by myself on this little boat, just trying to stay afloat. The more emails I answer, the more I wonder why no one is really writing me...the more alerts I get on Facebook, the more it seems no one is paying attention. The more guest-posts I write for blogs, the more I feel like I'm talking into a vacuum. The more appointments I have, the fewer people I seem to see.

This is nothing but illusion in a lot of ways, a trick of my overwhelmed mind, and I know exactly where it comes from. Because in these times of super-busyness, of overwhelm, everything I usually love just feels like One Thing More. One thing more to do that isn't helping me do what already needs done. One more decision. One more task. One more tap of the fingers on the keyboard.

As I got up this morning with that cloud of To Dos hanging over me, I said a little prayer for some help through it. And I heard a little reminder in the recesses of my mind. Be still.

I've always loved that verse--Be still, and know that I am God. It speaks to so much, doesn't it? And in context it's even better.

Come, behold the works of the Lord,
Who has made desolations in the earth.
He makes wars cease to the end of the earth;
He breaks the bow and cuts the spear in two;
He burns the chariot in the fire.
10 Be still, and know that I am God;
I will be exalted among the nations,
I will be exalted in the earth! 

~Psalm 46:8-10

Today, you know what that means to me? That all our strife, all our work, all our mighty deeds are nothing. He makes it nothing. He brings peace where there is none. He wipes out where we build up. But he builds up where we would wipe out. And sometimes, He just wants us to stop so that he can work.

It's a busy time of year for most of us. So much to do, and not doing it isn't much of an option. But in this crazy weekend, I'm pausing. For just a breath, just a prayer, just a moment. I'm going to be still and give my heart and all its overwhelm to him. Knowing, trusting that whether I succeed or fail, whether I go or stop, whether I cry or laugh, He is God. He will be exalted among the nations. He will be exalted in the earth.

That means in me, too. I exalt you, Lord. May that remain always the task on the top of my list. My top priority. My anchor on those raging seas. I exalt You.

3 comments:

  1. Such a true post, Roseanna. I think we all tend to reel from these must-dos in our life, the places that remind us we have no control. Ah, but He does.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I'm right there with you Roseanna! Psalm 46 is my all time fave, it sings through my mind and soul, sinking deep into my spirit--every time. No fail.

    Hang in there. Prayers on the way for your week sister. :)

    Also, I'm shocked that you, the tightest writer in my book world--yes, I think you are--has to cut 35K?? You must be a master at the slash and cut. But, really, your admission gives me hope. So, thanks for sharing that. I tend to over write my first draft. WORDY--blech. I have a lot to cut and hack too. But some of my crit partners tell me they think it would be easier to cut and slash than to need to add layers.

    Blessings on you and yours.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh, Anne, really? I'm the tightest writer? Goodness, that sounds lovely--I'm known in my critter circle as the Queen of Verbosity. ;-) My biblicals both checked in at 160K, and that was AFTER cuts! LOL I did manage to keep Annapolis and Ring of Secrets down to size--no cutting on those two.

      My editor says that too, about "better too much." I say that's easy to say when you're not agonizing over whether that one sentence is necessary or can be cut... ;-)

      My busy week isn't so terrible today, so I'm breathing slightly easier. The prayers are much appreciated!

      Delete